Rating/Warning: M for violence
Summary: Written for the AU challenge of the KakaSaku LJ community. My theme was witchcraft/wizardry. Witch Hunting. People say you can love someone that doesn't love you back, go to the deepest depth of hell for that someone. But can one love the man that captured her and decided she was going to be burnt alive? Can that man, who so easily labeled her as a lesser being, love her too?
They didn't speak the next three days. Kakashi tried as hard as possible to ignore her and Sakura stayed silent, distant and abstract. She ate slightly once but Kakashi didn't press her again about that, most likely afraid how things would evolve between them if something like what happened took place again.
Fear was something the female also felt. It was not just because of her upcoming burning but also because of how much she liked what transpired between them. It was complicated; in so few days, so many things had happened. They had argued, flirted, kissed, hurt and pushed each other to their limits. And although, for her part, it started as a plan it became enjoyable.
It suddenly became personal. And that was terrifying because they were enemies. Because the plan would work only if she didn't feel for him anything, but she started to develop feelings. And she knew that the hunter was trained to suppress his emotions.
He would complete his mission because that's what he was supposed to do; the church ordered him to do, even if very deep inside him there were emotions for her and he didn't completely agree with what he was ordered to do. It was his way of living and nothing would change that.
It was futile to believe that he would give in to emotions like that. The plan wouldn't have worked, even if she was able to be emotionally numb to him. It was just a desperate thought, a cry for help to the universe.
She looked at the ropes around her hands as they walked, him in front and her following tied, against her will. She let out a small sigh sadly and looked at the trees around her.
This was it. She had a week and a half until they reached their destination, her pyre. A painful death. She imagined again herself tied, as the flames approached her and she looked up desperately, fearfully and saw only the eyes of men that were celebrating her death.
Her hunter among them, enjoying his payment and having completely forgotten her. Not caring that her body, her skin, her flesh was slowly melting and she screamed in pain and agony. Alone in a painful red world that he condemned her to. And he wouldn't care.
Although, he could have been in her place. Although they were of the same nature.
At that moment, when the flames consumed her and he would laugh, she would hate him. That moment she would find it in her heart to hate him.
Kakashi felt her discomfort as they walked and resisted the urge to look at her. He wondered what she was thinking, what a little girl that had lived so few experiences could think so close to her death. After what happened between them, he wondered about her, her life. Did she have a boyfriend? Was she a virgin? How many things would she never experience because of being captured?
By him, who was so much like her. He was guilty once again and it infuriated him how much she affected him. It wasn't supposed to be like this; never had this happened before. He was practicing this profession for more than ten years, he had captured and led to the fire so many men and women, but none affected him to that level. There had been people who didn't appear bad and he nearly liked them but none of them were able to invoke these kinds of feelings in him. Apart from the fondness he felt for her and the sexual desire, thinking of her and their situation made him feel guilty.
The only other time he felt that was when he saw a small nine year old girl burn in front of her parents who later followed her in the underworld. They also looked so human.
Although they were supposed to be devils. But her weak screams of pain as she cried to her mom to save her, her father to take her away and they cried because they were unable to save their child, didn't let him sleep for nights. Everyone around him, his colleagues and friends, laughed and ridiculed their pain or stayed silent like him and never voiced their thoughts. Never did any of them do anything to save a child that was burned to death just for being born to parents like that.
He didn't want to go against the church's orders but he believed they should at least spare the small kids the pain; it was unnecessarily cruel. But he was a coward and stayed silent, just watching as her cries stopped because she fled from that world of pain and went to the other hell where she belonged due to her diabolic heart.
But she screamed so much like a human and her parents cried so much like human parents that loved their child.
Is magic enough to strip someone of their humanity? Is magic enough to allow him and his colleagues to make the love those parents had for their child inhuman? Did they have that right?
Deep inside him, the answer was no, they didn't. It wasn't enough but he could be wrong. The church, the books, the priests couldn't be. If they also were then there was nothing certain and stable in the world. If people accepted that the church wasn't always the true and divine way of living, they would be forced to live in chaos, right? They would doubt the rules and live in a world that, for all the great matters, there would never be a certain answer. They would always agonize about death and life and God, heaven and hell, even more than now.
Was Sakura living like that? Unsure of the truth and unable to understand it?
Could her way of seeing the world be closer to the truth? He had heard that the witches and wizards generally accepted the world as it was, without trying to define it, because they couldn't. Was this uncertainty closer to the truth?
Could real magic give people the insight to see the reality? To accept the world with its mistakes and irregularities, all the creatures that were on it, without fear of conflict? Or perhaps accept that conflict was unavoidable and just try to avoid it as much as possible?
Was she really a demon? Was his father a demon? Were they really worth burned for something that maybe, like him, they had no control over?
He stopped and left his pack on the ground. After tying her legs, he left to find woods so he could light a fire for the night. But the question didn't leave his mind.
Sakura lay down and closed her eyes tiredly. These were the few moments that she could be alone and relax slightly. When he returned, she slightly raised her eyes to acknowledge his presence and then she turned her head and looked at the trees around her again sighing.
She felt terribly alone and lost. She needed so desperately some kind of communication, someone to listen to things that she never told anyone else.
"Hunter?" she called him weakly without really thinking. It was so tiring to think because all she did was think and remember how cruel he had been and how much she would have liked someone to love her. How difficult loving had become.
How much she would like to find someone to understand her.
As she suspected, he didn't answer but she knew, without even looking, that he was listening. "Has this ever happened to you before?" she asked and looked upwards to the sky with the thousands stars. "Have you ever been drawn to someone so easily, so quickly and so illogically? Have you ever been attracted to a victim of yours?"
Silence. But through that answer, she could hear the real answer.
So she decided to continue talking until he cracked and answered. "I haven't. I had only one boyfriend in my life and he was not a good one. He was distant and cold." she smirked as she thought of the dark haired man. "He was gorgeous, though; the most beautiful and desired in the village." a small pause again as she remembered her village and her peaceful life, away from the rest of the world. "I was so happy and honored that he liked me. I felt special because he chose me out of all the available girls. I gave him everything a teenager could give; my love, my devotion, my first kiss, my virginity. I never thought that I deserved anything from him because he had already given me the most important thing; himself." she let out a small laugh. "I was a fool because, in reality, he didn't give me anything. He just wanted to have someone for his needs and I blindly served him. It didn't matter that I was in pain or that I was not ready at fifteen, because all I wanted was to please him. Because I knew that if I said no, he would take what he wanted from someone else." She stopped talking, waiting for him to say something or for her to find the courage to continue. He never spoke. "In the end, he left to follow his desires, his ambitions and I just stayed behind. Maybe he thought I would always be available whenever he returned but I was so angry that I decided I would never be any man's toy again. I showed my worst side the first months; I slept with strangers, worked maniacally to become strong. It took me months to calm down." she finished and closed her eyes tiredly.
She was angry with both him and herself then. How stupidly and blindly she had given him experiences that she could never take back. Time didn't come back.
"I wish now that the end is so close to have chosen more carefully." she confessed to him. Some tears fell from her eyes. "I wish I had been loved by a man once and loved him back. I would like to have lived that once before I died."
He turned slowly and looked at her. "Why are you telling me all this?"
She raised her shoulders and their eyes locked with each others. "Because you are the only one I can talk to now and I really didn't want to die without having told someone how I felt."
"We send you priests for confession the night before. You can tell him everything you want."
She looked at the sky again and shook her head. "I can't talk to a stranger about my feelings." she looked at the trees again and turned her back at him completely. "You are the only one from there that I got to know. You captured me; it is your duty to listen. The repercussions of your action." she felt more tears on her face. "You decided my death." she accused him.
He looked at her, noticing for the first time how curvy her waist was. "Don't forget me." she muttered and he nearly missed her words. His eyes closed and he lay down, turning his back at her too.
She wanted to be loved and love back. He tried to imagine the boy that broke her heart and made her act as she'd described. He imagined her trying to hide the pain and the fear from her face as he entered her, her body not ready but her mind serving him dutifully. He was cruel and harsh, not caring for her pain and just tending to his needs, not caring if she enjoyed the act. And after he was done, he turned his back, leaving her alone and unwell.
Something like that would have happened by the other men she slept with. They may try to make it more enjoyable for her but it was just an act with no feelings. The notion of how that boy violated her emotionally and, to a certain extent, physically too, bothered him. The idea that all these faceless, nameless men experienced a girl so magical, without respecting and appreciating her bothered him.
The idea of how he would treat her if she was his. He closed his eyes and allowed in that solitary, private moment his sexual urges to take over his mind. He imagined his hands caressing her waist up and down, feathery touches, kissing her belly and her whimpers, as he did nothing more than just lightly and tentatively touched her. He would tease her like that, promising but without giving. He would prove to her that an experienced and capable man is able to make a woman feel so ready and willing, just by simple, nearly non-existent touching.
It would become unbearable to her and then she would beg, with her voice harsh, full of desire and that sound would drive him mad, especially when it was to come out of her mouth. He would start kissing her then and suck her lips and tongue while she would arch her body below him and feel the evidence of his desire. But it wouldn't be enough for her to have him inside her.
He would slowly take care of every part of her body before he took her. And it would be in the forest, under the moonlight, close to water (or even better, Kakashi imagined, inside water), transforming her to a water goddess, a nymph that resides in a lake or hides in the woods, in the shadows of the rocks and the trees, and appears in fairy tales to make men search all over the world for creatures of such perfection and desirability. But among all those men that searched for a creature like her, he would be the one to take her and he would be the one she would choose in the end, showing that boy that left her and made her allow these men to touch her how better he was. How she would always choose him over him.
Without understanding his hands went down to his pants and slightly rubbed his arousal. His eyes shot open and he took a big breath. He tried to relax, to calm down, forget of that scenario but his bottom didn't seem so eager to forget.
He looked at her sleeping form and suddenly felt the urge for some small physical interaction; he could just go lay there and hug her.
And pretend. Pretend that some moments ago they were making love, cared for each other, and the morning to come she would turn and give him a good morning kiss and then they would make love again. That boy forgotten.
It was weird that he was so jealous, more jealous than he could ever remember, over a woman that he didn't like lusting over with a boy whose name he didn't even know. It was worse than weird; it was a sin. But... he looked at her small, petite body. It was such a beautiful sin that he wondered if it could actually be a sin.
Finding something divine in someone so like him; could it be a sin? Could a man liking a woman be a sin?
He hesitantly got up and walked with nearly trembling feet to her and looked at her longingly. He wanted to touch her but he knew that by doing that he was going to envelop the devil in his most terrifying form; the one that looked innocent but underneath was Satan.
Yet the devil inside him called to her. Her body called to him and he gave in. It was the part his father left in him, the devil part, that gave in but as he hugged her and burrowed his face into her hair, his one hand caressing her hair and his other rubbing her belly over her clothes and his one leg tangled with hers, he was grateful for being his father's son.
This gift, this feeling while he imagined she was his and he could live that dream all night, was one of the most enjoyable experiences in his life. Slowly his hand moved upwards and rest on her small breast, that seemed to fit so well into his hand and he felt he didn't want to let it go, ever.
In fact, he didn't want to move from that position, ever.
That was his greatest sin; maybe the most important sin in his whole life. Nothing he could do in the future could compare with this and the outcomes of this; he was not only giving in to Satan's, but he was not regretting it. He was, for the first time in his life, accepting that at heart he was a demon too.
And he suddenly thought of his dad and imagined his death. Did he cry? Did he resist until the very end? Was he afraid and sad of leaving his only son in the hands of his enemies? Did he know that he was going to become a weapon for the cruel men that came and separated them? That he would be used against people like him?
He looked at the pink haired witch and tightened his grip on her body. Did he know that he left him alone, all alone?
Did he know now that he wanted to go against the church because his demon side finally woke up and protested against killing her? All the others' deaths hadn't managed to make him feel so against what he was doing his whole life. But he knew that if he killed her, at least half of his nature would resent him forever.
And that would mean he would completely hate himself, because his human side always hated the demon inside him and fought it his whole life, trying to stay on the path of the church. He loved his mom. What he remembered of her was a warm feeling of protection and love that enveloped him completely. But by loving his mom he had loved his dad too, because mother adored father.
In her eyes, he wasn't the creature sent from hell but the angel from heaven.
He remembered how broken his father was when she died. He cried and the pain was so raw that, although he was a small kid, he felt he had to help his dad recover.
Was he going to be in that position if she died? Was he going to blame her, his whole life, for stealing, even though unwillingly, his serenity and peace? Would he hate himself if she died and he was left only with dreams of her body and sparks of her fiery character that could so easily be broken? Would he be able to continue being a hunter after seeing her scream and burn alive? Would he be able to continue if he let her go? Would he look in agony at all the prisoners' faces to make sure she was not one of them? And if she was among them, would he save her again?
He didn't know, didn't want to know, because he was afraid he would end up like him, father, and like a human he would crumble, as his dad did.
Like a human...
He cried after her death...
She cried in fear for her life, in pain and agony...
She refused to eat once she finally understood that her life was over...
Like a human.
Humanly, she crawled into his life and her image was nearly ruling him now.
He kissed her hair again and let his eyes drift to the moon as it shone its silver light on their forbidden, never to come true, position. He loved his father and he still did. He always would and that could not be a sin, he decided, because respect and love towards one's parents was important.
And he was so close to loving her too, or falling in love with her... he couldn't tell the difference but he loved every second of it and resented it simultaneously.
Sakura woke up as she felt the sun hit her face. She opened her eyes and noticed she was untied. She lay down again and then looked at the man that was watching her intently again. She felt awfully uneasy under his gaze and yet it also felt so familiar for a reason. It was like she had been for hours under his eyes that were searching her body without touching.
Actually, she felt really warm, like someone had been touching her moments ago. Was it a dream? Did she see in her dream that someone was watching her and hugging her and kissing her in a very innocent, yet sensual way? That must be it, otherwise it didn't make sense. It must have been because of telling him how she felt last night.
It was a dream that would never come true; her sleeping and someone who loved her was hugging her protectively, keeping her warm and out of harm. She smiled at the idea and then slowly her smile faded as reality hit her once again. She was going to feel warm in the future, the very near future, but it was not going to be a nice feeling. Instead of a lover, hungry, red flames would hug her and instead of protecting her, she would be at their mercy in a fight she wouldn't win. And the price to pay for losing would dying.
She sighed and shook her head. There was no point in thinking again and again over what was going to happen to her. She could dream and think and imagine that lover and how nice her time with him could be. She looked at Kakashi smiling softly and a little sadly. His look slowly changed and instead of bringing out of her a sense of danger it made her feel warm. His eyes became slightly softer and he eyed her again with a warmth and slight tenderness (?) that caught her breath. It was such a slight change but he appeared now a different person. He was more man than hunter and she felt her heart beat faster. It was absolutely beautiful.
HE was beautiful and so desirable to her. If she ever had someone to hug her, like in the dream, he would be like him as he was now, with that warm yet slightly distant look. But she would be able to skip the distance and he would see through her walls. Without crushing each others' defenses they would be close. Without making each other vulnerable they would be one, a couple.
She felt tears roll down her face again and started laughing slowly. She was crying again for the future although she had promised in her past that she would stop being weak and act more like an adult. But she was afraid. Was it so childish to be afraid to die? To cry?
The lover would never come. Maybe he would never exist, like how no one really hugged her that night; it was just a hallucination of her mind, projecting her needs for companionship. There was no one to hug her but the hunter and Kakashi would never do that. Even if he thought about it, he would never give in to what she represented; Satan and his powers. And it actually hurt that he saw her only like a demon, camouflaged in human skin, while she tried but was unable to hate him.
It wasn't true, real, but it could be true as a fantasy, a dream; him hugging her as they lay together on the ground. She looked at him again and he looked back at her and she wondered what kind of lover he was. He seemed experienced, or that's how she imagined him to be. Did he treat his lovers well? Was he warm and tender, took care of their body so they would enjoy it with him? Did he hug them after he was finished? Was he the type of person that wanted a stable relationship or just sex? Or both, but according to the woman he was with. And what type of female body would he like? Skinny girls? Or more curvy? What was his favorite eye color, hair color? Did he have one?
All these questions suddenly invaded her mind. They were simple questions, without meaning or real interest; it was because she had nothing better to do. It was just the outcome of boredom and emotional exhaustion. It had nothing to do with interest towards him, just sheer curiosity.
Yet, she couldn't deny that she would really like to know the answer to some of these questions.
Three nights had passed since he spent the night with Sakura, hugging her and feeling her body next to his. The feeling of her skin, her hair and their smell didn't leave his mind and he found himself craving for a repeat of that night. He found himself unable to sleep and just stared at her back or her face, but never again going to her. He was afraid of what he would do, how he'd react to her body. He feared that he would not finish the mission, that he would give in to her; a thought that was so appealing, especially if she gave in to him too.
It was infuriating how all those forbidden novels he read despite the church's orders now were pushing him to disobey orders again. It was like a sin that seemed so unimportant to him was tempting him to go against his vow as a hunter. Rules...
Was it so important to always follow them, especially when they seemed so wrong? He looked at the female walking behind him and felt awful seeing her tied up, forced to follow him. He felt guilty for tying her and leading her to the pyre. He slowed up and eventually stopped walking, still looking at her. He looked at the sky; the sun would set soon but they could keep walking a little more. He eyed the pink haired woman again and noticed that she was looking pale again, a result of her not eating a lot. Just a few bites of bread once a day.
"We'll stop here." he said and she nodded without looking at him.
After lighting the fire and preparing food for the night, they sat in silence and ate. The witch bit slightly her bread although he had caught and prepared soup with some vegetables. He looked at her form and, seeing her sad eyes, he felt the urge to get up, walk to her and hug her and maybe do even more things to her. It was really wrong that he felt that way.
As it was wrong to love his father but he couldn't help it. He suddenly felt anger at the memory of all those men, his teachers, that instructed him to hate his dad and be careful of the demon inside him. He had never questioned their words but the more he thought about it the more he found himself attached to the memory of his dad and his mom, the more he accepted the "demon" inside him as an ability and not an existence that would take over him.
The more he thought it was wrong on his part to think like that the more he enjoyed thinking the subject.
The church was against thinking because people came to wrong conclusions and then they were Satan's prey, but he found himself thinking that wrong also. The question that the witch had asked him so many days ago that it seemed like a lifetime ago came to his mind often.
Who said that she was a demon and not allowed to live? That what he was doing was not wrong? That he should hate her, instead of love her? That loving her was a sin?
The church, the priests who read the sacred books and advised people, according to them. And he found himself asking who said that the church and the books are not wrong? They were human and the books were written by humans also. What if they were wrong?
What if he was killing people who didn't deserve it up until now? That little girl's scream came to his mind. Did she die and cry like that because of someone following the wrong instructions? He looked at the pink haired who had lain down and turned her back at him. What if she was going to die because of him and the wrong instructions he was given?
It was dangerous to think like that but he couldn't help it and he didn't want to; by thinking like that, he could convince himself to save her, to stop before it was too late. He could even be sincere with her and give in to what he was feeling without being guilty.
"How many days do I have?" she asked and he turned his head to look at her. She was lying and looking at him now but what he noticed was how her breast appeared from her position and he felt his mouth get dry and his knees became weak while he felt again the need to touch her.
Someone, he decided, that may be wrong. And thinking that, he got up and went and sat close to her. It was difficult to restrain himself now that she was so close. She eyed him curiously and suspiciously as she sat up.
"A few more days." he told her and took her hands and untied them. He held them for a moment and slightly caressed them as he admired how delicate and well made they were and thinking how they would feel on his skin, caressing him up and down and then go down to his lower parts. He was shocked with his mind. He was a man and he was thinking about sex like all healthy men, maybe a little more than most men, but the situation had worsened the last few days. Everything screamed at him sex; every part of her could be involved at the intimate act of making love to each other. She pulled her hands from him and he looked up at her, trying his hardest to conceal his desire and appear normal. She bit her lip and, for a moment, he was sure his face told her what he was thinking. She seemed surprised and maybe a little scared. He looked away immediately as he untied her legs and couldn't help but stare at them a little longer than necessary. There were marks from the rope and he tentatively caressed them with his hands.
"Does it hurt?" he asked without looking at her. She stayed still and shook her head but because he was looking at her legs, he didn't see it.
"No." she said and he slowly let go of her legs.
He looked up at her and after taking a breath he put a small distance between them. "Does it hurt?" he asked her again and she knew he wasn't referring to her legs anymore.
"A little." she admitted after a while. She glanced at him and then looked away immediately when he raised his eyes to meet hers too.
"Ask." he encouraged her to speak.
She bit her lip slightly and he again felt awfully aroused by that action. "Why are you...?" she asked but didn't finish her sentence as her voice lowered.
"Why what?" he asked and pressed his body closer to hers, suddenly deciding that he was going to live the moment with her, flirting and learning her. He, Kakashi, wanted that and for the first time in his life the rules didn't matter. He didn't want to obey and he didn't find himself obligated to obey.
She looked away and slightly blushed at his slight touch, biting her lip again. "Why are you acting like that?" she said in a low, guarded voice, suddenly feeling very shy around him.
He smirked behind his mask, finding himself very attracted to her shyness. He had seen her angry, sad, depressed, sexy, horny, peaceful, afraid, desperate, provocative and challenging and now he saw as shy. He wondered how many other expressions could be formed on her face. How would she look while laughing, smiling genuinely? How would she be while having sex, while waking up, while eating and chatting? He really wanted to see more sides of her at the moment.
"Acting how?" he pressed her and a small flash of anger and annoyance passed her eyes. He grinned and brought his body closer to hers while she leaned back to put some distance.
"You know...li..like you are interested." she said in a seemingly strong and confident voice but her small stammering betrayed her nervousness. She suddenly felt very hot, like she couldn't breathe and he was taking the air away from her because of being so close, forcing himself on her.
"Why shouldn't I act like that?" he asked her, faking an innocent expression to tease her.
She opened her mouth and then closed it without making any sound. "You said that we are not supposed to be doing what you are doing." she half stated, half accused him. "You said that it's a sin. You act so frustratingly and confusingly" she said and now her voice was angry. He didn't move; just kept looking at her as she let out her anger at him, a feeling he caused and perhaps not just by his actions moments ago. "Listen, Hunter," she started but he put his finger on her lips silencing her.
"Kakashi." he corrected her. "Tonight, I am just Kakashi to you, and you are just Sakura"
She stared at him and gulped slightly. "Kakashi, then." she agreed and took a big breath to continue her speech, this time calmer. "I am not well. And we both know it." she said but she found herself unable to continue. "I.. I..." she tried but the words nearly choked her. She turned her back at him and covered her ears with her hands while immediately closing her eyes. "Leave me alone." she told him as she tried her hardest not to cry.
The silver haired man was not so surprised about her reaction as he had anticipated an emotional outburst. He actually wanted one so he could start talking more sincerely. He slowly took her hands away from her face and just stayed still, hold her from the back. "I inherited my powers from my father." he told her. "I didn't think of him at all until we had that conversation some days ago. Everyone told me that I should hate him and resent the demon he placed inside me… but I find myself now unable to hate him." he leaned to her and placed his head on the crook of her neck. "Do you know why?" he asked.
She shook her head and turned to look at him, feeling rather intimidated by his breath on her skin.
"Because I love him." he admitted and looked at the female and slowly took his mask off. "I wear the mask to hide who I am." he slowly pulled it down his face. "I am a hunter and my identity should be unknown. But I do not want to hide myself, who I am, from the world only; I want to hide myself from myself." he brought his face closer to hers. "Do you know why?"
She shook her head again and her eyes held an unreadable expression to him. She wanted to hate him but always found herself unable to. And now he was doing exactly what she had done to him; sharing something personal and unique with her, so she would never be able to hate him completely. She did it for him to have guilt about her death, he did it so they would be even perhaps.
"Because I was afraid of whom I could become, because I could become like my father."
"...And get burned too?"
He raised his shoulders and looked away from her. "I don't know... maybe." he looked back at her. "Or maybe I was afraid that what I was told would be true and I would really find a demon inside me. I would not be human."
There was a pause of silence and they just looked at each other. "I think your father was human." she told him softly. "As you are. It's not a certain characteristic of ours that makes us of another race. Having a certain ability isn't enough to label someone as inhuman, beast or demon."
"Then what is it?"
She took his hand and placed it upon her chest, where her heart was below the bones and the flesh, protected and beating. "It's the heart, our heart, that decides that. We choose what we become." He leaned closer to her and she didn't move this time. "Your dad... he was human." he looked at her eyes, as his face was inches away from hers. "You wouldn't love him if he wasn't, after all. He wouldn't love you, either, if he really was a demon." she said and saw Kakashi leaning to kiss her as some tears escaped his eyes.
It was a sweet kiss, with a lot of emotion, that neither of them could name but it wasn't a passionate kiss. They pressed their lips without moving them at first and then she slowly opened up and he brought his hands to cup her face as he delved his tongue into her hot mouth. The previous time they had kissed because of Kakashi trying to feed Sakura they didn't have the opportunity to taste each other and explore but now they silently communicated by kissing.
Then Sakura felt the restriction spell of his to be lifted off her and her magic was able to connect with his. This act, by itself, was significant; it showed that at some level, maybe subconsciously, he was trusting her, or beginning to. She brought her hands to his face too.
Everything happened so fast and before she had the time to realize what was going on, she was with her back on the ground and a male over her body. Their soft and light and tender kiss evolved in a matter of seconds in a passionate act that promised a lot. For a moment she wondered if she should stop it but she didn't. She didn't really want to. He moved his head and started kissed her neck, at the beginning lightly but soon with more force. He sucked at her neck and she moaned and brought her hands to his head and pulled his hair.
He moved down and kissed as much of her skin as he could and then placed his head again on her chest while his hands moved up and down her body, caressing her softly with feather touches. He pressed his head on her chest and closed her eyes. "I think yours is human too."
Hearing those words come out of his mouth moved something inside Sakura. She found herself being happy about it although she shouldn't care what he thought. She felt relieved that he accepted her the way she was, that he understood how wrongly he had judged her. Those simple words triggered inside her a source of need to feel him that took over her.
She grabbed his face and kissed him passionately as she hugged him tightly. She desperately pulled him closer, pressing her body at his while her hands worked their way over his lean muscles covered still by his shirt. She inwardly cursed the piece of cloth and she started removing it when he broke away in need of air.
She looked up at him and he smirked at her challenging and honest look; she wanted him and didn't care to hide it. It was a simple act for lust; perhaps with some feelings that weren't necessarily for each other. He didn't know why she wanted him. Why would his words mean something important enough to make her react like that? He didn't care. He had her. She offered herself to him and he was no fool to let this opportunity go to waste.
It didn't matter why. He didn't know why he himself was doing this. The only thing he knew as their bodies grew hotter and hotter was that he needed her, needed to feel closer to her at some level. He sat up but remained on top of her and positioned himself that way so his erection was pressing her area and slowly removed his top. The female moved beneath him and raised her upper part to touch his chest now that it was on full view.
She slowly kissed it and tasted it as her tongue moved its way. He had such a strong body that, if she hadn't seen his face, she'd think he was just some years younger than her. Soon her hands followed and started to touch him. She pulled him down and kissed him again, enjoying his weight on her body, his overpowering presence. He kissed back as he started to raise up her dress. She felt hands on her legs, her hips and soon under her underwear. She gasped as he caressed her and instinctively moved against him while moaning.
He smirked in male satisfaction realizing both how wet she already was and how easily his touch affected her. She pulled him closer again and started nibbling his neck as she hugged him tightly in a desperate need to have him closer to her. She hadn't understood how much she wanted him until that moment.
"I want you." he whispered as he put his finger inside her and she bit his neck while groaning. He moved his head to her neck and start sucking and eventually bit her too. She arched at him and he pushed his finger deeper.
She moaned again and looked up to see his face, all flushed. "Hot..." she managed to utter. "So hot." He slowly pulled his finger out of her and removed her dress, leaving her only in her underwear below him. He slowly started removing her undershirt and her breasts were on full view. He looked at them and then at her face again.
She smiled at him sweetly, nearly innocently, and he kissed her again while his one hand cupped one of her breasts. Her hands were all over him and soon they were trying to take off his pants. He didn't help her by moving up or taking them off himself,though; he just kissed her more and sucked at her lips and tongue before his attention moved to her exposed upper body.
The witch let her head fall back as she enjoyed his attentions, moaning. It was like nothing was wrong with that. It was like he knew where to touch and how and when. It wasn't just her body that wanted that; it seemed at that moment that all her being was approving of what was happening.
And she decided to play with this sensation and pretend that they were a couple and loved each other, not a hunter and his victim that were attracted to each other. For as long as it lasted, because she would never get another chance.
For as long...
Kakashi woke up because of the sun falling down on his face and noticed the female sleeping soundly, using his chest as a pillow. He smiled and closed his eyes again, remembering the moments they shared some hours ago.
It had been amazing, he had to admit. It was the first time in his life that he had let go like that, not caring about anything else but her and how she felt and made him feel. Her skin was soft like that and she tasted so nice, additively nice. Although in his imagination he had envisioned himself taking her slowly after making her beg for him to be inside her, he found it impossible. Their intercourse was the result of days of sexual frustration, maybe even weeks. Maybe he wanted, inwardly, to take her from their first argument. He was interested in her from the beginning, after all; he just didn't notice how much and how he was interested until very recently.
He had hurried and claimed her but she didn't seem to mind. In fact, she urged him to hurry, like they didn't have time, like that very moment and minute they wasted was a moment and a minute they wouldn't get to have. He looked at her sleeping face as she moved slightly and hugged him a little tighter. She was such a beautiful creature, so seemingly fragile and yet so strong at heart.
It saddened him how true her reaction had been; they really didn't have time to live anything. She was going to be handed to the church soon and in a day's time she would be thrown to fire.
You will hand her to church...
That was the saddest part; he would be the cause of her loss. He kissed her hair and his fingers lingered on his skin, trailing circles over it. He kissed her head again and looked around again, his much earlier thoughts coming to his mind again.
Would he really hand her over to them? Was he going to let her die and stand by and watch? He glanced at her sleeping form. How was he going to react to what happened between them? How was she? Would she accuse him of taking advantage of her emotional weakness and needs? Or would she smile at him and kiss him good morning? Would they repeat last night's actions? Ever?
He didn't like the idea that this fleeting experience was going to be all he would get from her. He still wanted to fulfill his fantasy and show her how different and more capable he was than the men she had previously met. How she needed to respect herself more and allow men that could respect and admire her body; touch her. Although, to his surprise, the idea of another man touching her angered him.
"Mine." he murmured under his breath and pulled her body closer to his. His eyes closed then, realizing what he had just admitted to himself. Seeing her as his, claiming her as his, was wholly inappropriate. In no way was she his.
He shouldn't really worry about rivals for her. She was not going to have the chance to be with someone else as he would never have the chance to have her again. In less than a week, she would be God's and only His. But the notion truly bothered him.
Why should he continue that work? After how much he had changed in the past days it was nearly stupid to go back. He wouldn't be able to capture more people, when he himself was one and two out of three people he found most important in his life up until then were magicians. The only exception was his mother who had fallen in love with a wizard.
He didn't know what he was feeling for the pink-haired girl but it was strong. He didn't know her well enough to love her but he knew her in a way others didn't. She knew him in a way that no one else did. With her, he wasn't the hunter but Kakashi, who was able to use magic. One of the few who knew about his abilities and the only one to accept him instead of being afraid.
It wasn't just lust. He couldn't fool himself into believing that; it involved feelings, not necessarily of love but of need, emotional need on his part, at least. He couldn't change what he felt and he didn't want to. On the contrary, he wanted more, not satisfied with how he took her that night, how little he got to taste her body. He pulled her closer and covered them better with a small blanket. She made a weird sound and snuggled beneath her arm while she tangled her leg to his.
Was she with him last night just because she lusted for him? It was from the beginning apparent that she found him attractive but was that it? Did she hate him? What would she do if he freed her? Would she leave and never look back at him?
It was very possible, he concluded. He had hurt her, after all, and she thought he was going to let her die. She had even suggested that he would even celebrate her death. The thought of how bad his image was to her angered and agitated him. He had stopped wanting her death from the first night, when she cried and was in pain. Even then, he didn't see a demon in her; he saw a girl in pain and despair. That was the reason he was angry at her; for not being a demon and making it even more difficult. She wasn't the only one that was humanly but none of the previous wizards and witches were so emotional. Maybe it was because they were older; she was one of the youngest he had captured. And she would be the only one to escape; the last one in a line of victims, prey, for the hunter in him. She was his prey but not the way she imagined.
He wanted to devour her, make her want to stay, make her his. Make her forget about that boy, make her be so devoted to him as she was to him. And he wanted him to see what he had lost; he wanted to meet him and see Sakura choose him, Kakashi, over her previous lover.
He was immensely jealous of him, despite never meeting him. He wasn't sure if he wanted to meet him. He wanted to see him lose Sakura and be pained by it but there was a fear inside him that Sakura would go back to him. And that idea made him angry and possessive and jealous because it was very possible for him to lose her.
He didn't even know if they had something between them. Maybe she slept with him out of despair and loneliness; maybe if she knew she wouldn't die and he wasn't an enemy she would not spare an older man like him a second glance. She was young and fresh and so full of life that he felt he got some too.
He felt her move again and looked down at her face. Her eyes slowly opened,, she rolled on to her back and looked at him. There was a moment of silence and the man thought he heard his heart beat faster, anxious about her reaction.
"Good morning." he told her, trying to act normal so he wouldn't scare her. She still didn't talk and just looked at him. Then she sat up and covered her upper body with the blanket. She glanced at him and then at the ground.
"Why didn't you wake me up?" she asked him as she looked around for her clothes. "Don't you want to reach the church as early as possible?"
He sensed her nervousness, how uncomfortable she felt and perhaps scared. He half smiled as he leaned and caressed her back slightly with his lips. She went stiff again but did not push him away. "I thought we could take a break today?"
She looked at him and he smirked at her confused expression. Then he saw anger pass her eyes and after that sadness. Wondering why she was so upset about what he told her, he sat up and hugged her from behind, placing his head on the crook of her neck.
"We can just rest." he said and started running his fingers over her body.
She turned her head slightly and then looked away from him. "Rest?" she murmured.
He nodded and pulled her closer to him. "Rest" he affirmed. "Take a break from reality."
She let the blanket fall and turned to look at the older man while her hands went to the back of his neck. "And pretend?" she asked, blushing slightly.
He hesitated for a moment because he was not pretending, only she didn't know that. She still thought of him as her killer, the guard who was keeping her caged until the fateful day. She didn't know she wasn't going to die. He really should tell her that he had decided to change his way of living and seeing the world all because he met her but he didn't. He just leaned in and kissed her.
If he told her, she would leave and he would never see her again. He wanted her to be close to him; she was the reason he was thinking of abandoning everything. Not the only reason but the main one, the alive one. His parents were dead and he couldn't continue to work for people that were against his whole being and existence. They wouldn't accept him if he told them the truth. He always knew that so he never spoke and for all those years he didn't accuse them but himself for being born the way he was. He never went against what he was told, against the rules. He never questioned their validity.
But the question she had asked always came back in his mind.
Just some people, that was his answer. Some people who were human like him, like her, but just raised in a certain way to not accept everything that was different from them. She was right to question them, especially since she hadn't felt a demon inside her to justify their accusations, since she knew that she could choose how to use the magic.
Because some few of them do hideous crimes with the magic wasn't enough proof that all of them did the same things. If that was the case, "humans" were equally guilty since they also had among them killers, rapists and all kinds of criminals. That was what she had told him but he understood the true meaning of her words later on; our actions define who we are and become. Attitude. The choice of attitude was God's most precious gift to mankind; they could make mistakes and they would be the only ones to blame just as they could choose to do the right thing, even if the wrong seemed easier or more satisfying.
She was human. He was human. And he couldn't stand the idea that she was there, with him, out of despair and maybe even fear. Was she afraid that he would be cruel to her if she denied him? Did she believe he would force himself to her, so she decided to come willingly to spare herself more pain?
He didn't want her to leave. He wanted her to stay with him. He wanted to make her want to be here. He claimed her lips and pushed her down. He was glad that soon she was responding to him with passion. It meant she wasn't afraid; desperate, perhaps, but not afraid of him. And he was, for the first time in the last few years, genuinely happy and free with no mask, either visible or invisible, to hide him from the world. Right now, she was the world and she saw him so much better than anyone had ever seen him.
Only that she didn't know.